What's The Missing Ingredient? A Kappa Career or Lifestyle Path!

The morning has started off very well considering I feel energized by putting petty jealousies from others behind me.

One unpredictable byproduct of recent events is that I have found or rediscovered my voice and undeniable potential to get Kappa in better shape than when I found it. I also learned that I was not alone in my sentiments and out there all on my own.

When accusations come your way, it is very difficult to not wonder what was indeed present to make another feel justified or entitled to hurl such ordinance your way.

But jealousy weakens and does not empower the jealous versus the object of their envy. Jealousy does not empower and green eyes do not always wear well with the bright red Kappa blazer!

If it were possible, I would have to get a restraining order against the mindset "if I can't have you, then no one will";)

This brings me to the place to remember what it was like as a young 18 year old college freshman to sit within interest group meetings and listen to what Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity, Inc. had to offer and the benefits the members were enjoying.

Upon crossing the Burning Sands, my Sands and I enjoyed the consuming joy of Brotherly Love and we did not have to go Philadelphia to experience it!

But after the membership certificate and identification card arrived, to this day I have not seen evidence that no initiate before, during, or after my initiation has received a career path or track that we should look to either implement or synthesize into the rest of our lives.

I know that some would say that Kappa is not a job or career or military tour, but most organizations that have a long-term desire to stay in existence have some type of history of progressing its constituents from point A to point B and so on for the rest of their lives.

I know clearly that a career path does not exist for the way our Senior Kappas are not fully engaged to their maximum capacities to contribute their wisdom to the Bond as well as receive a new level of personal security that they never have experienced before within their lives.

I might sound idealistic, but what a wonderful world it would be if Senior Kappas and their families (especially those with empty nests) would receive the attention and care that one's grandparents (or these days great-grandparents) might normally receive and expect.

I know that within the past days of yore, it would not be too uncommon for a Brother to send some Scrollers to mow the lawn for a Senior Kappa. For goodness sake, my Sands and I even did the same for the polemarch of the local alumni chapter who was clearly young enough to take care of his wife's "Honeydew" list on his own.

I am not complaining by any means because he hooked all of us up with a serious cookout and video that I would almost kill for just to see today if it still exists (21 years later). He did get thrown on the grill with the full trimmings after the word got back to the rest of the alumni chapter;) But I digress.

I know that our legal counsel would not consent to revisiting such days, but my point is that we need to take better care of our own ON OUR OWN and not only remember Senior Kappas but all who reside within the communities that we cherish.

The truth is that without a designated career (or lifestyle) path in place for the entire organization, we are leaving the most vulnerable fully exposed to find their own way.

I know that in some circles there are no lack of solid mentors, but overall the statistics and common sense have been tapping on our foreheads for decades to realize that a revolving door was built by somebody somehow and for some reason considered legitimate at the time.

A career or lifestyle path (I will use the latter name from now on) would not only serve to retain our precious human capital, but also educate and inform our newly initiated and current human capital that it will have the responsibility of taking care of its past members, its young, and receive the same care from an uninitiated generation when their days of youthful vigor defer to the days where the probability of joining the Chapter Invisible greatly increase.

With such a lifestyle plan, Brothers would be able to see what is expected of everyone and identify where they are within the plan as both a giver and receiver.

Continued membership would then be reinforced and the Kappa lifestyle loop would be closed versus the existing U-turn that revolving doors emphasize.

With all of this said, let's explore a brief "what if" scenario.

In the absence of a lifestyle path, what if every initiate was required to either be polemarch or a committee chair on all levels (local chapter, province, and Grand Chapter) upon crossing the Burning Sands?

Immediately unless they were informed otherwise, a ton of new initiates would make a valiant attempt to perform the roles and tasks required of them.

It would take the bravest of the group to openly tell the Bond that they are not prepared, capable, or fully equipped to handle such responsibilities.

It would take the most courageous to say that they do not have all of the answers while attempting to fulfill the requirements and expectations.

But isn't this the same case and situation where we find ourselves today regardless of when and where we were initiated, our past life experiences, and career history?

There are a ton of offices, committee chairmanships, and other roles filled by well meaning but ill prepared personalities and egos.

When was the last time we heard or it was recorded by an officer, committee chair, or anyone else that someone said "I do not have all of the answers, but here I am and this is what I will attempt to do" and "Brothers, I need your help"?

I would love to see an online search feature of past editions of public such as The Journal and private documents to see if such statements have been made. If they have, then they were not expressed loud and clearly enough to reach the lower levels where I reside;)

If they were announced within the environment that has existed up to now, a riot of the highest magnitude would immediately break out or a political coup would be launched like a cruise missile. Forget about impeachment or asking someone to step down in such a situation, the order of the day would be revolution and the head of the king must roll;)

Without a lifestyle path, our individual and collective success is really more the exception than the rule.

The nature of these thoughts and this blog entry center around training, indoctrination, education, and learning more than anything else.

No one is to blame, it just happened. But now a better way does indeed exist. The expertise is already present to create such a plan. All we have to do is make the need known and make ourselves available to their wisdom and counsel without demonizing those who propose such plans as commonly occurs.

As an individual, I do not have all the answers and I am brave or foolish enough to say it;)

One of the gatekeepers that have kept us in such a situation is that we have the belief or have brainwashed ourselves with the repeated variety of statements "All diamonds are the same size and/or my diamond is no better than your diamond" or something to this effect.

I agree with the statement as it applies to rights of membership, but what should happen if you send me today to pilot the plane when the previous pilot just got sick or has died?

I don't know about you, but I have my eternal life insurance paid in full;)

As the joke goes, if the pilot's time is up and dies does that mean that everybody's time is up?

Who can I turn to and ask to receive training or a plan without being made to feel as if I just signed up for a lower degree or class of membership?

Where can I receive counseling, assistance, and guidance after experiencing the war of daily life and now have untreated post traumatic stress syndrome from being isolated and not being able to ask for help.

A lifestyle plan would help remedy some of these ills that we are facing within our own minds and within our own corners of the world.

The bravery needed to step out and step up may not be there in massive numbers yet.

But we must reward each courageous one that signs up for the continued education, lifetime learning, and reaccreditation class or syllabus.

Or should we form a support group or 12-step process without a leader?

Man of Kappa Alpha Psi, either create a lifestyle plan or submit something that the lifestyle plan should include today.

This Bond is Yours!

Yours in the Bond!